The Joys of Quarantine

The Joys of Quarantine

By Nechama Dina Smith

At this time when lots of life is shut down--school, trips, shopping besides for essentials, shul, and get-togethers, and we are home with our spouses and children 24 hours a day for the unforeseeable future… there are also bright spots, some cherishable highlights that I’d love to share with you.

Number 1: I am so excited and thrilled to make my children healthy meals three times a day. On the very first day of our home exile, my husband told me, if this is going to work, we need to set meal times and snack times, and the kitchen should be closed in between. That was the wisest decision, and now without the influence of outside offers of Gatorade, bissli, lollies, white pasta, graham crackers, cereal and low-fat milk, they are happier to enjoy my more wholesome food. Not fancy, not elaborate, but tasty enough that they eat it (and they are more open to it without the other options around.) I am not criticizing anyone who utilizes those aforementioned treats--my kids get that every day in regular society, too, but now’s my chance to unsocietize them and nourish them for every single meal! Now just to be honest, Purim was a week ago so there are all sorts of bags of goodies that I just close my eyes to and at least try to not eat myself.

Number 2: My big boys are home. Whenever they leave to Yeshiva, I am so happy for them but a little part of me leaves too. I don’t know how I’m gonna deal with real empty nest syndrome when my flock actually moves out, gets married and has homes of their own. (I already decided I’ll take up bird watching then). So they are home, and I love every minute of it. I get so much nachas from them. They learn all day, help in between, and all the younger children adore them. They diffuse fights, they spend time with their siblings, and they set the tone for learning so that every other child wants to learn too.

Number 3: We have time for each other. The kids play so much more. They work together often on their homeschooling, some of them have chavrusas with each other, and oh… they get to hold the baby. Baby holding therapy is real. I’ve seen my tantruming child melt as soon as she holds the baby--life gets sweet and gentle again in that moment. And the baby is getting enough attention to make up for my regular babysitting job where he is just one of the crowd.

Number 4: Without devices, at least for the main part of the learning day, they get so much learning done, minus the drama of fighting for turns for each device and waiting for an hour to figure it out and straighten out glitches and get distracted and get that drugged-hysterical-edgy behavior that comes from too much screen time. Before online school was started, my husband set up the tables and all the kids and books and schedules and it worked amazingly. When the online classes got set up, the peace disrupted majorly, so we went back to round the table learning and activities and each following their own set-up schedule. I am happy though that the online schooling exists and were my husband to not be available, I would give in to that, and I’m sure the teacher’s hard work would be enjoyed.

Number 5: In trying to build up their vitamin D levels because that’s supposed to ward off the virus or minimize the damage, we got an outdoor kiddie pool--10 feet wide, so it’s not too tiny. And because it’s Florida and not snowing, they go in there an hour or two a day and I sit with them and get my sunshine too. And that is so good for everyone’s mood. Plus, they get hungry after that. Even though it’s not real swimming, it still does that to them! So they get to eat a nice healthy lunch right afterwards.

Number 6: There’s more time in the day to reinforce good habits. There’s no carpooling which includes going into the car-- skipping all those ins and outs save so much time and hassle. Believe me, homeschooling is not for me. I’d rather they go to school and then I can kvetch about how their school isn’t perfect--but at least they are in school! But you have to admit--not doing any driving to school is awesome. So we have more time for the tooth brushing, the benching after meals, the clearing off of plates. Things they need to do but I usually don’t end up making sure happen. So now I have no excuse, I have the time to make it happen! (Don’t ask me if I do, though. Planning is my forte, not necessarily actualizing.)

Number 7: There is so much humor about the virus situation going around. True, it’s not funny for the person going through it, but when they G-d-willing recover, they can join the humor whatsapp forwarding party as well. These lines keep us smiling.

Like: “In 2050, John finishes the last roll of toilet paper his parents bought in 2020.”

and “‘Your Covid-19 test came back positive.’” “‘ That can’t be correct. I have more than 300 rolls of toilet paper.’”

or I”m starting to teach the children about Pesach but I got stuck: Kadesh--when the father comes home from….uh…”

and “Reminder: 9 p.m. is the time to remove your day pajamas and put on your night pajamas.”

and The Vacation Travel Map, outlining all the rooms in your house.

These just keep coming and keep us in good spirits.

Number 8: This teaches us about life, what’s important--not all the outer stuff, but our family, our loved ones. We don’t have a choice, we are spending so much time together, and that is the most precious thing one can ever ask for.

Number 9: Empathy: we all know what it’s like, we are all in this together, we know what everyone is going through, though for sure some are having it harder than others (picture both parents that are teachers trying to teach online at the same time as having their children learning and making sure they are eating meals as well as not beating each other up). Unfortunately some people are actually sick with the virus and are really suffering, and we pray and wish for them to have a complete and speedy recovery.

It’s my place to only speak for myself, not for anyone else. So here goes: I feel like I should have stood up for the people that have recently been affected by schools no longer accepting unva((inated children. Though I was spared, others were not. And this was a devastating rejection for healthy unthreatening children to have to endure. Now we are all rejected, we are all stuck at home, and many people are losing their jobs. I hope I remember never to take the pain of another lightly. I am only speaking for myself. I did not do my part, and now I get to feel what that is like.

Number 10: We get to see Hashem’s hand every step of the way. When one door closes, another opens. All financial issues will IY”H fall into place. We are all Hashem’s children, and hardships only bring us closer to Him. He only wants us to ask. Even in little things we see His guidance. So it’s true,my babysitting group is closed for now, but I’m selling more elderberry syrup--which by the way is delicious and so helpful. We are making more food and spending money on it, but probably the savings on gas money covers that. And what do we need new clothes for if we have no one to impress? Just kidding. We women need new clothing to bring joy to our Yom Tov. Hopefully some time before Pesach all will be just fine and we’ll flock to the Jewish clothing store and give them business, and make ourselves happy.

With lots of love and prayers that whoever is sick gets better fast and completely, and may no more people suffer. And may we cherish every member of our family and be kind and caring to all our brothers and sisters.